The last few years have been difficult for me. Laundry list of sad and hard episodes that had me spiraling downward even before COVID. The pandemic just made sure that all sparks of hope, strength and courage were completely stomped out.
It took all I had to get to work, and drive home at the end of the day.
Winter of 2021 left me exhausted. No energy to even look forward to all my favourite spring and summer activities. I tried to lift my spirits with a rally call out to my Facebook community. Despite the wonderful support, I continued to feel this dark emotional paralysis. Simple everyday activities seemed overwhelming. Any energy I could rally was reserved for work because as I am not independently wealthy, and need the pay cheque.
So there I am, hiding in my dark basement from yet another glorious summer day. Rather than spending the day at the beach SUP boarding, I was wasting time with dreadful thoughts of the fast approaching winter.... when I was struck by the absurdity of my self-inflicted imprisonment. Fortunately, being plagued by depression since I was 15 years old, I have had decades of practice finding ways to claw out of my darkness. Usually ideas I come up with fail me before I can even fully think them out. Luckily, this time I actually had an idea that provided me a guiding light.
YEAR 50 daily truths.
To avoid completely boring you any further, I will cut to the chase. This blog will suck. I am not a writer and I am not witty or insightful. However I am cynical and not above self deprecation. There will be days I will not post anything and days I won't shut up. This will be used as my vehicle to self discovery, and as a platform to publicize my goals in an effort to keep me from further loss of time, money and effort.
Let the amusement begin!